Siate Felice
I went to Italy this past summer. Before we left, I took an Italian-speaking class to learn the language and the culture.
I fell in love.
Italian warmly rolls on the tongue and invites me to enter another world. I love the way it sounds.
I adore the culture and the way of life.
So, months ago when I was at a pottery class and had the opportunity to paint a coffee mug, I included a favorite phrase.
Siate Felice
be happy
Now…here’s the funny part.
I consider myself creative and take pride in my creative endeavors. So as I was painting my coffee mug, I had a bit of a snafu. I painted the word love. I painted the word dream. I painted the words siate felic. Yep…could not fit the final letter e. Oops!!
For a moment, I kind of froze. What can I do? I thought of all the options…buy a new mug and start all over; not enough time; paint over it with a new idea; that would ruin the look of the mug entirely; leave it; someone will notice my mistake.
The later became my choice. And it has stayed with me ever since.
Why?
There’s a part of me that seeks perfection and organization in everything I do. It has served me well. Over think. Over analyze. Think through worst-case scenario. Educate others on what could happen so we can be present and enjoy the experience.
The imperfect me judges the imperfections that show up when I leap into a creative act and find it a bit messy. I am not necessarily proud of this part of me. Leaping has always felt beneficial in some ways like a needed balm to my wavery insecurity.
Do we only leap when we know we can make it?
It’s a lofty question because it opens us up to our very own ridicule. I speak volumes to others about trust, and integrity and following their unique alignment. Yet, I judge my own imperfections as limits to my personality and potential.
Our imperfections breathe life force into every moment.
Why do we find it so challenging to offer ourselves the grace of imperfections?
I can hear the voice in my upbringing –
“Make your teacher happy…”
“Make your mom happy…”
“Do what you’re told so your mom/dad will be happy…”
“Your grandparents will be so happy if you can…”
“Be a good….so that your neighbor isn’t unhappy with you.”
“Don’t get in trouble as then your….will be unhappy with you.”
Maybe this is just how my family and community was, or maybe you see some similarity in your own earlier experiences. Society, family dynamics, educational systems, and communities at large condition us to think outward first and only think of ourselves as it fits with the outside silo of happiness. Therefore, we have been taught to care less for what we need and want, and even what is possible.
Women especially are expected to put their husband or partner first and children next. We are the last on the scale to be weighing out options of what we need and want. Single women really feel the wrath as society judges their attempt to put their own needs above anyone else.
If you do not speak Italian, you will not know that my word is spelled wrong. No one in my family would have known and yet something within me had to tell them. It is our inner voice that cultivates a prison to our own imperfect potential to rise.
I know I am much better with this inner voice and calming its inflamed approach to chastise my every imperfect expenditure. I am learning (and practicing) laughing at my mistakes, my errors and my lack of kindness to my own self.
Our inner voice is a sanctuary to our most precious gifts: vulnerability, openness, intuition, compassion, and energy. We use this wellspring as a tool for relating to others, for determining our next right action, and for rooting our sense of self into our own belonging.
At one time these gifts were looked down upon. We were considered witchy, unreliable, and beneath the roles of society. Now they are bestowed as highly regarded.
Are we really judging our imperfections, or are we judging our perfections that are afraid to be seen in the world?
Our inner shadow is relentless in holding us in our self-prison. Women have been hiding for years afraid to be seen for the highly intelligent and highly conscious individuals we are. Women have worked extra hard to be validated and approved by everyone, yet have a tumultuous inner life, sick with gut issues, unhealthy diseases, and overweight.
Samantha Garcia, in her book Regenerative Business, talks about the highly rated technique of controlled burns. Environmentalists conduct such actions when the landscape needs to create space for more sustainable growth.
This got me thinking.
How can we bring intentional choice to a controlled clearing of our inner landscape?
In my experience and some of my practice daily have been to allow the burn and often initiate a burn. What are some of our every day burns?
Anything that fires you up. Pisses you off. Takes you outside of yourself. Distractive. Addicted. Allergic.
These are what burn in us because they are the very shields keeping us from who we are and rising out of the slumbers many find themselves in.
Social media is a powerful place to allow a burn. Notice what activates a sensation in you or a high disinterest. When it does. Get rid of it. That’s how the controlled burn works. You must get rid of what is not in your highest regard making us creative beings keeping watch of our most sacred self.
Emails and notifications are another place to burn away the overzealous abundance of your energetic attention from what matters. You do not need to be notified when someone posts on Facebook. If you are meant to see it, trust you will. That is the way the frequency and vibration of the universe work. Burn the emails away. Clear them out.
I see so many individuals with 1000s of emails unopened and so much so that they create a new email. This is not the best use of your creative energy as the looming weight of the old still exists in your field of consciousness.
The stacks of papers, magazines, books, etc that you have not even looked at for years. Get rid of them.
A controlled burn within our daily lives helps us to encounter the very presence of what matters. Actually burning away brings a more expansive regeneration. It is when the clearing happens that the energy of what is aligned can actually make its way into your awareness. All the stuff has been getting in the way of what is delightfully yours.
Our highest and best self has always been aimed at being happy. Being happy is not about chasing the thunder of the extraneous nature of things, events, or people. Being happy is a state of consciousness where you sense a peace with what is, while also using creativity and curiosity to navigate the ebbs and flows of everyday living.
Siate Felice (with or without the e…you decide..wink…wink)
How can we love our imperfect lives a bit more so that we can actually be happy?
Clear the clutter from our external lives so we can hear, and really listen, to our inner voice speaking wisdom, insight, and guidance.
Accept the imperfection of wanting the clutter as a barrier to resist our highest self. Love that part of us is always willing to negate what is best in an effort to control the external experiences while also cultivating vulnerability and openness for our intuitive self that knows what is best. Surrender to how easily our energy can get discombobulated and acquire the satisfaction of a controlled burn to welcome it back to the quantum field of peace and happiness. This is where you will find your satisfaction for what is.
Know, without a doubt, that whatever activates a sensation of the flame within you – a burning pulse to fix, avoid, disregard, etc. – IS the VERY thing that must be rendered with compassion. You need it, so get vulnerable, open, more compassionate, and intuitive, and give it space to educate you about yourself. Let it burn and then you decide with a happy heart how it fits into your conscious lifestyle.
Siate Felice.